Soham Times October 2016
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Green Jokes &  thoughts By Uma Srinivasan Iyer

Green Jokes &  Thoughts 1
We study about plants in our secondary and tertiary education, and we call it as botany. But we do not know their medicinal and nutritional values and how our ancestors used them as foods and medicines.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 2
We select plants which are more tasty and delicious from natural forests and we acclimatize those plants. We breed and genetically modify them to please our taste buds. Plants loose their ability to survive in the natural environment and they have to depend on artificial agro chemicals to thrive. It is considered as another scientific advancement. We call it as genetic engineering.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 3
We clear natural forests and grow few selected crops in large scale. We use heavy machinery to disturb soils seasonally and we do not allow soils to form naturally. We use genetic engineering techniques and agro chemicals to have economical yield. We ignore the loss of biodiversity, loss of fertility in soils, disturbances cause to natural food chains, and we call it as agriculture.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 4
We disturb natural soil formation process seasonally with heavy machinery and apply heavy loads of agro chemicals to add nutrients to farm lands. We identify this process as soil preparation and fertigation. We do not consider soil as a living being and we apply toxic chemicals to eradicate creatures live in soils. We identify this as fumigation.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 5
We study about plant nutrients, volatile vitamins, antioxidants, etc. and we call it as biochemistry. We cook our vegetable curries more than twenty minutes and we ignore the loss of volatile vitamins antioxidants etc.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 6
We study about medicinal properties of plants. We do not consume these natural herbs as foods to get a daily medicinal supplement. We do not teach the importance of consuming these medicinal pants daily basis to avoid health risks. We teach and do research to seek treatments for ailments due to malnutrition and loss of immunity. We develop various drugs and medicines and we call it as health sector developments.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 7
We study about nutrient values of sprouts of various seeds where all bio chemical reactions take place to change starch and other chemicals in the aleuronic layer in to amino acids, simple sugars etc. for the germination process. We know that during the seed formation stage, all these amino acids, simple sugars are at edible and digestible form prior to full ripening. But we extend the harvesting period till all these sugars converted to starch and all minerals and vitamins hide in the aleuronic layer to get high economical yield. We harvest and mill them to remove the aleuronic layer and identified as polished state of seeds for consumption. We do research and complain the gluten intolerance and advice to have gluten free foods.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 8
We study about habitats of other animals and define them with respect to their ecological and other environmental parameters. We live like aliens with the aid of artificial control structures identified as homes, work places, etc. with in this beautiful natural drop of life in the universe. We identify the design and construction process as design engineering.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 9
We eat fast and processed foods and destroy natural ecosystems to produce those. We suffer form non communicable ailments due to these living patterns. We offer fresh fruits and vegetables to gods and we request blessings from gods to continue this process.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 10
We have teachings of our religious leaders advising us to live harmony with the nature and ways and means to end the sufferings we experience due to aging, illness etc. We believe that when we chant or preach these teachings, blessings of gods come from heaven to protect us. But we do not practice these methods to follow our religious teachers and we believe it as difficult task.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 11
We decorate our home gardens with various inedible invasive plant species and we replace the natural vegetation in our habitat. We do not recognize how we damage the natural eco systems, bio diversity and ecological resilience by doing this and we call it as landscaping.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 12
We clear natural forest cover in highlands for residential purposes as well as commercial agricultural purposes. We complain about the climate change and do research to combat the changing process. We continue to depend on the same development model which causes the change and ignore the vicious cyclic process we adopt to manage natural resources for the sustainability of our lives. We live in this beautiful planet like an alien species surveying hardly in an unfamiliar environmental condition.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 13
We worry about extraterrestrial invasion and enthusiastic about ancient civilizations and their extraterrestrial connections. We always investigate the outer space and trying to listen massages for another intelligent living beings. But we afraid of UFOs.
Green Jokes &  Thoughts 14
We talk about ecosystem resilience and techniques to improve it. But we do not try to rehabilitate large deserts in Africa and Australia. Our hobby is to find another planet to live more comfortably than here.

We study about how plants communicate and how they behave. But we do not listen to them and live harmony with them. Thank you - By Uma Srinivasan Iyer

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